Hallelujah! I did think, at one point, I was going to die of over exhaustion little sleep and food and eyes popping out of the sockets (because that is a common death in small undiscovered countries).
So I am home, and by that, I mean HOME where my mama, my heavenly bed, and my comforting memories reside. Tonight, my mom and I went on our usual market spree for the best and brightest organic, granola, leafy green yummies that we health nuts adore right under our Abba Father. As I'm standing in line putting the bags in the cart a lady approaches me asking about my hat I had cleverly put atop my grease ball of a head to cover my obvious couch potato ways of the day; however, the first part of our small talk convo could not have, IN ANY WAY, prepared me for the next half of our lovely, highly non-typical, grocery store chitter chatter. She continued by asking me if I was over 18, and I proudly told her my three week old age of 21 ( I feel REALLY legal these days, don't ask). She shoots back a response saying "Oh, great honey. Here's my card. I'm a romance educator." Smiling and thinking that her job was spent counseling troubled, bickering couples, she contradicted my thoughts and oh so pleasantly elaborated her job title that dealt with, ahem, vibrators, awkward pleasure toys I will not further mention, and other lustful curiosities of human nature the sexologist Dr. Alfred Kinsey is accredited to discovering. It's times like these when I wish a floating mirror would appear, so I could see my eyes grow as big as a bullfrog's as my facial expression instantly gives away my current thought of awe and shock that people, as this woman, continue to evoke and promote daily in my life. Highly needless to say, I was floored as my mom stood near in wonder of what the woman was whispering to me. I could only reply with an "Oh." No pun intended, my friends. Anyways, her services and knowledge is offered through, as her card read, "Saucy Ladies' Parities." I have never heard of these ladies nor this type of party until tonight. I didn't and still don't know if I should be offended at the fact that she thought I needed some of these objectionable objects, or if I appeared in any way that I needed some spice of that sort in my life. She was nice.
Although I can say "No thank you" to Ms. mam from the grocery market, I can owe her a thanks for an entertaining, car ride home story that my mom, although a bit shocked as I was, enjoyed throughly.
Hey, who doesn't love learning something new everyday even if it might be a bit saucy.
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